me now

I am a 26 years old woman with many cildren around me.I am an elementary teacher. I am married to a wonderful husband. He is the one I know as a person showing care and love much.I have been married for 4 months. I am working in Makassar now. It was hard to separate with him as a new couple. I thought that was the hardest.......until........It was much more harder to find that I feel pain in my stomach.I did not know why....It comes whenever it wants to come...In my sleep...in my teaching........in my laughter with my students....in my meeting with the principal........in my walking.........and even in my dream........horrible.....I always tried to get to sleep as soon as I can. I hope I will not feel the pain.  when I am in my sleep. I was so afraid........Feeling the fear, I wen to a doctor..... I thought I was ready to find the truth...I was ill..... I knew it....but I did not what the heaven was that.
She is a woman, the doctor, gave me schock, more than the surprise I feel when I had my student telling I hit her...I have 2 cysts. I was trying to pretend that I can accept it. FAILED..I cried...In my phone, I told my husband about that..... I cannot continue this, I need to lay down... My back is hurt..